A Brief Reflection on Writing

So I finally wrote that story that I told NTT's Brain a year or more ago, you can check it out on my other blog, http://brevity-is-wit-so-why-do-i-keep-writi.blogspot.com/ , if you care to. To just give a little insight into the attempt, I wanted to play around with narrative distance. I worked with a third person, limited omniscient perspective - the narrator has a fairly limited view of what Akemi is thinking, so her perspective colors the view of the events. It is not quite in the realm of an unreliable narrator, but you can tell (if I did it correctly) that the objectivity level shifts from time to time, sometimes simply describing events, and at other times injecting Akemi's views of the situation. Anyway, I tried to be subtle about it and I don't know how well it worked. I would appreciate any comments (no, I am not fishing for complements, I want to know how effective it was, if it was effective at all). I like the overall feeling of the story, you get a good sense of who Akemi is without me telling you, and you get glimpses of her relationship with Tsuyoshi - as well as insights into who he has become, and his dissatisfaction with both his lot in life and with himself.

I also like the idea of the story, but I am not sure if it is too abrupt. I know how the events are supposed to play out in my head, but I am not sure if it is too abrupt, or if I did not give enough detail to the surrounding to make the setting real enough. I really didn't describe the environs at all because I wanted the piece to be more character driven. I haven't decided whether that was a mistake or not.

Thanks for bothering to critique if you have time, and you'll have to wait til later today (or maybe tomorrow) to read my reflections on the just passed housing bailout - but if you want a preview - What a f---ing mistake that is!!! It continues a soft money policy that was started under Bill Clinton, and continue by George Bush that just guarantees the need for another bailout in the future. If this intrigues you (which it probably doesn't), read what I have to say about the historical context later...

Have a nice day :)